The Crazy Life of a Cape Town Mother and Wife: Hands that do dishes...

Further to my recent posting on hands, which many of you dear readers seem to have enjoyed, and here I thank you for your positive feedback, I simply must fill you in on what my own, once lily white little hands have been up to. Nothing wildly exciting unfortunately, like getting behind the wheel of a Boxter. Oh no my dears, my hands have been doing dishes. Poor, poor old Suzy Q!

Our trusty-not-so-old-dishwasher hasn't been cleaning our dishes all that well for a while, so I finally took the plunge and called in the appliance experts to take it in for a service. To date they've done nothing much with it, apart from telling me that it appears to be working well for them on a test cycle. Do they have a set of specially soiled family dishes for this specific purpose I wonder? And for this bit of non-information I am no doubt going to have to pay handsomely, as well as having the HUGE inconvenience of being without my most useful household appliance. Do you know that many women rate a dishwasher as being more useful than a husband? Not me naturally, but now that I'm without one, hmmm...!?

Now that I have googled the problem, I am rather sorry that I've sent the machine away, as it seems there are a number of simple solutions using everyday household products which might just rectify things. Or even simpler, it seems that running the hot tap before each cycle might do the trick. Double damn!

LIAR!

Not to mention that I literally feel tied to the kitchen sink. On a normal day we place all used crockery and cups into the dishwasher, and run it when it's full. Voila, at the mere flick of a switch, out comes a pile of clean stuff, and who cares if they have of late needed an occasional extra wipe? Nowadays, it's rubber gloves, Fairy Liquid, greasy washing up water, and me! Press the repeat button. And again. Is it any wonder that I'm phoning the service centre hourly, like that other petulant Desperate Housewife, Gabi, to find out when my baby is coming home to me.

If we could, it would be takeouts all the way. Miss SQ No 1 reckons that having to wash one's own dishes is the best diet aid, and guarantees instant weight loss. Wish I could agree, desperation and frustration are propelling me towards the cookie jar. Although I was only fortunate enough to acquire a dishwasher in my later adult years (yeah right, probably weren't invented when Suzy Q was a kid) I can't believe that so many women were subjected for so long to such repetitive tedium. That and the sluicing and washing of nappies. Ok, so I've done that too, but with the benefit of an automatic washing machine. Women washed, and washed, and washed. Full stop. Sadly, as I speak from my fortunate suburban spot, there are still many, many local women without running water who struggle to wash anything and everything from communal taps which are often without water. I should complain? Wonder if the President's many wives suffer the same problems?

But back to the things which have most revolutionized or improved women's lives. A poll conducted earlier this year rated the contraceptive pill as the No 1 product. I guess we can all see why. Fewer nappies and dishes to wash, surely? No 2 was the push up bra, proving that we are all really and truly animal creatures at heart. This was followed at No 3 by the washing machine. Ok, practicalities will eventually slot into place after all that hot passion has dampened down a bit. Funnily enough, my esteemed dishwasher didn't crack the Top Ten, can't think why. Maybe the mating ritual centered more on the wining and dining of women, leaving them guessing about the mountains of washing and dishes which accompany domestic bliss?